Girl going away.

Sunday 21st December 2008.

I've watched 6 films today! How cool am I?
I've also completely decided that I love Christmas, not expecially the day but the run up to it. I see people a lot more often and I see a lot more people. Everyone's so much more welcoming and happy. It's great.
It feels so weird being out of the country at Christmas time. It sort of feels a little bit rude. Like walking out of a room just as someone else walks in.
This is my last blog for a couple of weeks while I'm on the farm in Argentina. So I want everyone to have an amazing Christmas and New Year, and I hope you all get everything you want.
I've been very lucky this year.
I'm going to miss everyone so much!!! Christmas is supposed to be all happy, but it actually feels quite sad this year.
Have a good one.

Merry Christmas Everybody.
Girl going away.
x.

Girl snuggled.

Friday 19th December 2008.
Saturday 20th December 2008.

My two Christmases at home... and boy have they been good.
Yesterday I spent the day with my mom's family. It was so good to see my cousin's baby daughter. She's only five and a half months old but she's growing up so fast, and she's absolutely gorgeous. She's at the stage where she smiles whenever I make a funny noise, which is quite a lot.
Then on the night was my house warming party. Was it the best party we've had or the worst? For very different reasons. Even though there was a lot of drunkeness and crying it was still a good night. Well I got something I've wanted for quite a while anyway.
Then today has been the best Christmas ever. In all honesty if it was a real Christmas day (then obviously I couldn't have gone shopping but other than that) then I would have loved to spend it the way I did. We finally have a sofa in the flat, so this afternoon was spend snuggled up with 'someone' watching Pirates of the Carribean.
Tonight, I've been at my nan's house for my Uncle's birthday and my Christmas. It's been such a brilliant night with all the family together, it hasn't been like that at Christmas for a long long time, but it's finally back the way it should be. Everyone's spent the night laughing together about 'how it used to be'. And I'm old enough now to appriciate that Christmas isn't just about receiving presents, because I do take so much joy out of giving someone a present. However, I can't explain how great the present off my dad is.
Thank you.
To everyone I've spent time with over the last few days, thank you for being there, the way you always are.

Christmas isn't a season it's a feeling.
Girl snuggled.
x.

Girl forgetting homework.

Thursday 19th December 2008.

Today was a day I was supposed to spend doing my homework that I won't be doing while I'm in Argentina... but instead I've been distracted by comedy tv, my friends and god knows what else. Should I do double the work tomorrow, or should I just think sod it it's Christmas?
Dad seems to be having the time of his life at the moment. Going out whenever he pleases, and coming home along the same guidelines. I have to hand it to him he's being amazing. I wish I could not let things get to me.
Over the years I am getting better at it, but then sometimes I still let little things annoy me.
At the moment there's the one major thing. - Why can't people not get involved in other peoples' business. Especially when they don't even acknowledge the other person usually.

My friends are my little family I've created. Love it.
Girl forgetting homework.
x.

Girl still living through the mistakes.

Wednesday 17th December 2008.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again - There's nothing like a day that wasn't planned, but turned out randomly good.
I'm noticing more and more just how hard it is to write the blogs when I'm happy and there's nothing wrong. (Not that I'm asking for any dialemas or anything!)
I've started thinking about my new year's resolutions. I haven't got my final ones yet but I'm thinking it should mainly be along the lines of 'work harder at school'.
Why is it that in most circumstances and situations we always know the right thing to do, and we know exactly where we're going wrong... and yet we repeat the same mistake over and over again? Is that just another one of the curiosities of human nature or is there a reasonable answer to it.
People say we learn from our mistakes, but I'm afraid to say that a lot of people don't. Otherwise why would people continually trip up over the same hurdle?

I love the photos in my bedroom.
Girl still living through the mistakes.
x.

Girl feeling festive.

Tuesday 16th December 2008.

Well, I am officially feeling Christmassy. A little late I may grant it, but its quality is priceless. Today we went carol singing around the Pheasy estate with the teachers, and it was so fun! That is the type of thing Christmas should be all about. It isn't about asking people for what you want it's about spreading happiness in as many different ways as possible.
Tonight has been a very childish night, but in a great way. It's nice to know that however sensible you have to be most of the time and how fast we have to grow up sometimes that you can still enjoy times that are innocent. I love laughing at things that aren't even that funny, with people that don't think I'm weird for laughing at them... or they do but they stick around despite that.
It's also reassuring to know that however much time, people and places change that some things linger for a lot longer.
Sorry if I don't seem to have a poignant message for you all this evening, but I am just truly happy for no majorly obvious reason. I guess I've realised I have pretty much I could ever ask for and more.
I love everyone in my life right now.

9 Days...
Girl feeling festive.
x.

Girl warm.

Monday 15th December 2008.

Who is happier... someone reaching their goal early, or someone who worked long and hard to get there?
In life some people get their opportunities given to them too early for their own good. Often it's opportunities that they won't get offered ever again, but at the time it's too early for them to be really beneficial and actually be filled to their full potential. Other people get offered chances later than they would have wanted them and by that time they don't believe in what they used to anyway.
Is an opportunity actually valuable if it doesn't come at the right time or can it end up being destructive?
I'd like to think that being given a chance at any point in your life is a precious gift. However, deep down I know that it isn't true. There's a time and a place for everything, how ever wonderful it may seem. If it isn't your time or your place then sometimes the best thing is to let things pass. You never know. If it's meant to happen it will return at a better time and place.

What's meant to be will be.
Girl warm.
x.

Girl looking forward to a new world.

Sunday 14th December 2008.

Last night I had a big discussion over dinner about preconceptions. Do we all judge too early about someone or something? Or is an early judgement the most truthful?
I am aware I do it, and I think everybody does - whether it be conciously or otherwise. The truth of the matter is I don't think it's the preconceptions we have of people that cause the conflict, it's the way we act upon them and whether we're open minded enough to change them.
Some of us are black and some of us are white. Some of us are fat and some of us are thin. Some rich and some poor. Some thoughtful, some selfish, some good and some bad. By now we should all be well aware of the surroundings we live in and how different we all are. Difference is one of the greatest gifts we've all been given and within that difference we should unite to embrace it.
I can't wait to live in a world where no one judges people for something they think they are and not waiting before granting that decision. I can't wait to live in a world where people accept and enjoy.
If a lot of people agree with this then why isn't it opening up before us all?
The future holds the need to be educated. Not in geography, trigonometry or biochemistry... but in each other. Until we can understand the people we live with now how can we expect to move forward?

Create today the world you want to live in tomorrow.
Girl looking forward to a new world.
x.

Girl humming.

Saturday 13th December 2008.

I watched a documentary today. It was about how songs and music have affected people over time and how they have changed.
A few years ago someone said to me, "Life doesn't revolve around music." Well I beg to differ. (Here we go again...)
Many people have a birth song, if they don't then they almost definitely have songs played at a christening or a naming ceremony. At your 6th birthday party, your 16th, your 60th! All of these occasions are encrusted in songs. If anyone reminds you of a party you've been to I can almost guarentee that you can remember an exact song that was played there. Significant times or moments in your life can be associated with a song. We pick songs to be played at our funerals, weddings and every other occasion possible. Every day when you drive to work you have music played on the radio. Songs can define a person. Songs can make you happy, sad, laugh, cry or just simply smile as you remember the first time you heard it.
So for someone to say to me that, "Life doesn't revolve around music." Well let's just say that for someone to make such a claim they must be deaf or very well isolated.



-Yeah, I really do...

There's a song in everyone's heart.
Girl humming.
x.

Girl with her friends.

Friday 12th December 2008.

Well today has been an absolutely brilliant day. I don't think I've laughed this much in a long long time. All my lessons have been funny, and with some of my favourite people.
Tonight I planned on sitting in all night doing my English Literature essay. The the buzzer goes and the girls turn up. I love nights like this. All we've done is sit and talk and watch old videos. And I know my dad will come in and not be annoyed there are people here till midnight.
I honestly do think this is happiness in a room.
One thing could make me a lot happier right now. Who knows, it might just happen...?

We decide whether we're happy or not.
Girl with her friends.
x.

Girl feeling Christmassy.

Thursday 11th December 2008.

Today Christmas has hit me. Walking through town after school there was Fairytale of New York playing in the street, that feeling can't be linked with any other feeling we may ever possess.
How can people not like Christmas? It's something I really can't relate with. How can someone not enjoy the one time of the year where the smallest gesture can bring the biggest smile upon someone's face. It's the perfect time to let people know how you feel.
It's quite sad to think that in the world we live in Christmas Day seems to be the only day of the year that we still actually devote to family. Therefore if it is the only family day left in the year it should be valued.

I love buying Christmas presents for people. What a nice feeling is it to buy something that you know will put a smile on their face? If you think about it that is what we spend a lot of our time doing all the time. So buying gifts should be a great thing for us to do because it's our chance to pick things that will allow us to accomplish our every day task.
When buying your gifts this year make sure you think about what you're buying. Don't just buy everyone the same thing. It's boring, and makes you look like you couldn't be bothered.

The saddest thing in the world is to wake up on Christmas morning and realise you're not a child.
Girl feeling Christmassy.
x.

Girl meeting another deadline.

Wednesday 10th December 2008.

I can't explain how exhausted I am right now. It's been an incredibly busy day. I always say I like busy days, but I wouldn't say no to a nice quiet day where there are no deadlines to be met or anything like that. I haven't had one of those in a while.
Today we had the X-Factor night at school which went really well. I'd like to say how well everyone performed, everyone was so amazing!
And joining onto last night's blog I think I've decided upon something that's been occupying my mind for quite a while now. Of course I'm not going to give it away quite that easy, that would be very unlike the natural way of the cripticness of my blogs.

Which is better? A hectic day or a quite one...
Girl meeting another deadline.
x.

Girl waiting for a firework.

Tuesday 9th December 2008.

Back to my daily analysis of the life that I surround myself with, or is it the life that surrounds me? Do we actually get a choice in where we live, how we live or who we live with?
I do believe we all do get dealt a set of cards, as in any game of chance some people’s hands are easier and some are harder. But we must always bear in mind that it isn’t how we begin it’s how we finish. Your choices are half chance, sometimes we just need enough courage to take the chance, otherwise we end up living in the risk free realm. This is wonderful if you never want great loss, but without great loss you can never gain great success.
Meandering away from that analytical rambling I have another obtrusive thought. How do you know when the moment is right? People always say they’re waiting for the right moment, but who is it that signifies when it is? Never yet have I come across a parade of fireworks as a subtle signal. Beforehand the uncertainty fills me up and afterwards I am left only with regret. I do often wonder what the specific emotion is that hides in between.
There are moments when my impulses indicate to only one thing. But if the instincts only lie in moments then should I wait until they turn into time, days or weeks... or does that go against so much that I believe in? I guess it comes down to, should life be lived for the moment of chance or the years of stability?

It’s easy to give advice, harder to understand it and almost impossible to put it into practise. If you figure out how, do let me know.
Girl waiting for a firework.
x.

Girls changing the world.

Thursday 4th December 2008.
Saturday 6th December 2008.

The BBC.
Over the last couple of days my best friend and I have been working with the BBC to make a documentary on Children in Politics.
When I first got the phone call about it I was absolutely amazed that after a few short months we’d been singled out to do something so spectacular. After the original shock came excitement... Then came the work.
We had to plan and organise things for them to film and work on our answers to some of the most difficult questions we’d ever been asked. Why were we so interested in making a difference? Why do we think we can change the world?
The day when they came to school went well, all going to plan. Although it seemed as though the school took a little too much credit for it. Letters were distributed saying how the school had been asked to do this documentary. Ok I know people can get a little too ahead of themselves sometimes, and maybe we were, but nevertheless it was our hard work that had got us there, the school was only supposed to be a filming location. But of course, I’m never one to complain.
Then came Saturday 6th December; a day that will live within me for many years to come. National Climate Change day; the day of the march. We met up again with the BBC journalist and camera man who planned to follow us all day and ask us some more questions. Once we’d met the people from the UK YCC the whole event began to drop into place. I truly began to feel why we were there and I could physically see before me how we were making a difference.
As the day progressed we became more at ease with the whole situation, it isn’t an everyday experience to be staked by the BBC and someone constantly asking you questions. The answers to the earlier asked questions were now forming clearer answers in my head. Why, exactly, were we so interested in making a difference? We are the youngest members of the YCC and only been a part of it for nearly four months and yet already we’ve seen and experienced things I’d never have even dreamt we’d have the opportunity to do. And why do two sixteen year old girls think they can change the world? Personally I don’t. However the world is made up of people, people just like you and me. I know that occasionally someone comes along and inspires me and makes me think about things I’d never dared to dream of before. If our world is full of people with thoughts along similar lines to mine or can relate to that in any way then although two sixteen year old girls cannot change the world I am positive we will have a good go at trying to change the people in it.
Working with the YCC and the BBC I have learnt a lot. That there are people out there who are willing to stand up for something they believe in, whether or not it coincides with the beliefs of those who surround them. Secondly, while spending time out side of the documentary with the BBC men, they taught us a great deal too. That whatever we wanted to do in life not to delude our dreams and just become satisfied with what is expected of us. Instead we should aspire to do more than the expected – and do something we enjoy.
The experience has been about Climate Change and taking our turn and chance to make a difference and work towards a better future for everyone. But while taking that route some other important lessons have been learnt and enjoyed.
These accomplishments have been the best in my life so far and I honestly couldn’t be more grateful than I am as to whom I have shared it with. I know we’ll always be standing together to share every success our future holds.

Never stop being better because that is when you stop being good.
Girls changing the world.
x.

Girl with a can of beans.

25th November - 8th December 2008.

Some of you may notices, some of you may not. Some of you might be glad to be rid of them, some of you may have missed them. Not to worry though, my blogs are back from their brief departure.

In the last few weeks my life’s taken a drastic turn. Actually, I’m not sure if that is the way to describe it. Have we turned back the way we came? Or have we sped ahead and bought on the inevitable?

For once, I’m going to be explicit with what I have to say. My dad and I have moved out. We’ve moved from our ‘family’ and the house bought for us to all live in together happily ever after. To some that might sound upsetting, daunting, scary. For those who know better will understand the relief.

Since we moved out, we stayed with my Nan % Granddad for a week with the four of us living in a two bedroomed house and me sleeping on a sofa bed. I felt more comfortable and at home that I ever did in that house.

During these few weeks I’ve learnt some important lessons that will stay with me for some many years to come.

The first one being that money doesn’t make you happy. It might put a smile on your face and make things a little easier, but in the long run, if you don’t have the bare necessities in life then money will get you nowhere. It may buy you a house or car, but if you have noone to live with or go and visit then what do they actually account for?

My second lesson is about marriage. I can’t speak from first hand experience but I’ve been a part of two now and I think it is possible to learn a lot from just observing. I haven’t been put off, but neither am I eager to go running into it feet first. I’m not sure anyone has a perfect marriage, in fact, ‘perfect marriage’ is a complete oxymoron, however, if we don’t have a littlee magic, belief and hope then there’s never going to be a reason to try and reach a little bit further, run that little bit faster or walk into the unknown. I can’t imagine a single person I could love every day for the rest of my life. I think that would be one of the hardest things to do in life. But just because I can’t imagine them doesn’t mean they don’t exist.

Another thing I’ve learnt about is just how incredible my parents really are. Since living here I’ve had long conversations with my dad every night. One night we stayed up until midnight talking… just talking.On my day off, everyone went out with their friends, I went out shopping with my mom for the day. Parenting must be a hard job to do, it’s something everyone expects you to get rightm but never actually tell you how to not go wrong. Some how my parents have had the rules, tuahgt me the lessons and made their mistakes along the way, and along with all that they become two of my best friends. Two of my favourite people in the world.

Also, just like everything else in life friendship has a sell – by date. Some are like a can of beans; you’ve always got them and they’re ready whenever you need them. Others are like ice cream; lovely in small doses but never last too long. They you have the home made meal. If you can’t have it the first time around then you can always freeze it for a while and rehear it when you’re ready. Although there’s only so many times you can reheat it before it does some serious damage.

So those are my life lessons learnt so far. I’ve had quite an education in these two weeks. I’m not sure if everybody would learn that in their whole life. Is that good that they’re blissfully oblivious? Or bad that they’re totally naïve?



Never stop trying to obtain the obtainable.

Girl with a can of beans.

x.